I want to paraphrase the motto of friends of Framasoft (“La route est longue, mais la voie est libre”, www.framasoft.org) : the road is long, but you decided that your way was free. Have a good trip, Paula!
Big respect to you Paula, I hope that your transition takes you to a happy place
@Stefan : there are lots of good sites/vids on the internet about dumb things not to ask trans people (it might help reduce the uncomfortableness)
@srfk, Paula and Stefan know each other quite well and I don’t think Paula will make a problem of it. I understand Stefan’s post, I also don’t really know what to think of this. I have only met, and thus only remember, Paul “1.0”. I will probably have peace with it the next time I meet her, but until that I feel a bit confused because she isn’t the Paul I thought she was. At least, that is how it feels for me as someone who met Paula a few times.
For now, @Paulakreuzer, I wish you all the best. Like I said to you in the ICE train, I still hope to meet you again next year, and please forgive me if I have in my ignorance said anything that hurts you.
@everybody: Again thanks for the kind words.
@AlbertJP No, not at all! I’m not hurt.
I completely understand that it’s confusing, especially for people who have gotten to know me as Paul, though I bet it doesn’t compare to the confusion I felt before I discovered my real identity.
Oh and to everybody who has gotten to know me: Just because I’ll change my appearance and name doesn’t mean I’ll change. I am an will continue to be the same person I’ve always been. The biggest difference you’ll notice will probably be that I’ll feel more comfortable in my skin (if my environment doesn’t make me uncomfortable).
Congrats. Enjoy life have fun. Feel free and feel you! All the best
It’s reassuring to know that there seem to be people that know Paula and me better than we do ourselves and each other… There are lots of good posts on the forum about all the great time that Paula and me have spent with the Austrian Fairphoners.
In order to avoid further Besserwisser posts: Paula and me are in personal contact and we will meet up when I’m back in Vienna.
Very nice you give example to all people in similar situations. We all deserve to seek our true selves!! Congratulations in your new steps, Paula!!
All the best for you and good luck, Paula! Hope everything works out for you! Impressing of you to speak about this in public!
I have two trans friends IRL, and the thing that struck me most the first time I saw them after they went through the whole process (I lived abroad when they came out, so I just saw the “end” results after a few years) is that with both of them I instantly thought “you feel so much more like yourself somehow!”
Which makes logical sense of course, but I didn’t expect my “irrational” brain to agree so easily - I was expecting for having to overcome subconscious bigotry that we all struggle with in some form (obviously still happened on other fronts, luckily they’re good friends who didn’t insta-ditch me and helped point those out to me).
So all I’m saying is: I hope it’ll be the same kind of experience for you and your friends!
Best wishes, be happy !!!
Welcome out Paula, looking forward to seeing you at our next meetup here in Vienna
This might be the best post I’ve read on this forum (and there have been a lot!!). I am happy for you, Paula, and wish that you may receive back all the help and energy you’ve willingly consecrated to this forum’s users, in one way or another. And even if I see how this can be a confusing issue for many among us, I only wanted to state that both you and @Stefan have struck me as extremely kind and good hearted people. I therefore wish you both a constructive dialogue that may further deepen your friendship and understanding of each other.
From my side, again, most heartfelt wishes for a bright and happy future!
Herzlichen Glückwunsch, liebe Paula! Ich glaube, eine Herbst-Jacke von Dir hängt noch an meiner Garderobe? Willst Du sie zurück haben? Oder jetzt nicht mehr? Gebe ich sie einer Hilfsorganisation? Dann lese ich gerade ein (fiktives) Buch über einen Manager, der als Frau aufwacht und beschreibt, was sich dadurch alles ändert (also über Nacht). Das Buch sagt, die Wahrnehmung durch die Gesellschaft von ihr als Frau sei ganz anders. Eine Frau, die ein IT-Unternehmen gegründet hat, hat das auch gesagt. Mich interessiert sehr, wie es Dir ergeht und ergehen wird, ob es wirklich so anders ist.
Seems like I’m late to the party but hey, welcome Paula!!
Thanks again everybody for the kind words. It really warms my heart.
@Marie1: Aja, die Jacke! An der Heimreise vom #efct16 hab ich noch daran gedacht und wollte mich bei dir melden, aber dann hab ich vergessen und seit
2 Jahren über einem Jahr (wie @Stefan unten richtig hingewiesen hat) nicht mehr an die Jacke gedacht. Also offenbar ist sie mir nicht sehr wichtig, sie zu spenden ist wohl am besten.
I think it’s great you had the guts just coming out like that, on the big bad internet no less. I can’t imagine what it’s like but I guess it takes a lot of courage and confidence to be able to do that. It’s also great to see the positive reception on these forums. The attitude here has been very positive in general though so I wouldn’t have expected otherwise. These days there’s just so much intolerance in the world towards people who in generally are assumed to be “different”.
Having said that, your or anyone’s gender, sexual preference, religious background or whatever doesn’t affect me in any way so I’m not really giving a hoot about it. If you’re straight, gay, lesbian, transgender or whatever it is you are or want to be, it doesn’t make a difference to me. Doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be openly said or discussed (on the contrary), I’m just saying that to me, you are still the same person before and after this thread, deserving of the same amount of respect either way.
Why not? It is not so difficult right? If you do it for the @username references that might break I think we can fix that via a simple command via shell on the server.
Yes it looks like it worked…let me know if you encounter problems